" Mike , tomorrow we're going to movement"
My brother-in-law was coming to visit us, for a few days with his family. When he hears that Sunday 's sports program looks dejected at what majestic belly gently poured over the belt and then hangdog eyes at me.
I smile and look fine in a just two feet away where our wives , sisters with whom I was lucky to choose our miraculous base at a rate that would have shamed a battalion of bees, stopping only long enough to we throw one on poisoned look. That made the when seen , comparing notes and drew our eyes to them.
" Yeah, yeah, look what I belly, I could use the movement" surprising Mike attitude changes after three seconds he stared at the two doves .
The next morning we put a sport with all the breakfast plus cereal packaging gymnasts , hydrated for a marathon as we team from head to toe with the "just do it " or something almost identical and out.
My sister-in law does not miss the opportunity to take another look Mike piercing :
" Eeeeh ? Now what were you doing? 5 years I still rub to wrap you no longer sweats that you can do with it ... see I was right ? Recognize , recognize ! "
What to say Mike ? That five years had about thirty pounds and got her sweatshirt , which I never wore it with sports skills of a pickle, made him look like an anaconda Hall just a sheep obese ?
Better not to say anything and nod approvingly while out the door.
" Brother in law, but know that I'm not good for anything on the ground, I do not want messed up , sit on the bench "
" Mike , do not worry because this is a sport where you do not need skills . "
" Well do not play football ? "
" No fuckin ' football ' !
I have said more , but he sees that it's not so drooping , although still constipated look like a snake . I park in front of " Chez John " and give him a sign to follow me there. Going in the middle of a bar full eyes a great atmosphere where everyone was screaming, chanting between teams throwing each more challenging and the staff tried in vain to maintain order.
Mike followed me mechanically without understanding a word of what is happening, and I was trying to go as airy and as solder in front of him not noticing too much . I say hello to everyone, and I drop more by a word in uproar to know that I came finally sit down at the tables to the right of the club with Mike next to me .
Bartender beat suddenly the bell hung above the bar , pub and leave a supreme silence .
' Captains to choose teams ! Left is first . "
Taking advantage of his opponent's strategic whispering I explain the rules to Mike.
" God help me not to elect me for sure lose " he answers .
He stood solemnly captain and point the finger left and fixed , but fixed to Mike . Fucking two sizes too tight sweatpants that see a post that has a wife .
" We'll take the dancer. Hey , that's scuba gear or a tracksuit is vacuum ? "
I advise you guys soon and we elect Rambo hiding behind the pillar and look like you just escaped the leash wife .
Elections continue until five each team. Me I no longer chose no hell after I took the team to victory three times in the last two months , that's I becoming captain.
The five elected heads to the empty table in the middle, encouraged from all sides, tapped on the shoulder slap on the bottom, sprinkle with water, spent in cheers , I pray all the fuss devoted to athletes entering the ring.
Sitting down five to five, face to face, looking at each other like in the westerns of Sergio Leone. Actually they trying to look so exited that they came out less than if it were pricks with Clint 's gaze among them would not be chosen nor hell .
Bartender starter and all ten put their phones on the table. Dead silence . The clock is ticking hard and tension begins to grow . Nobody says anything , no drink anything , everyone plays by the rules.
After seven minutes one of the phones on the table starts buzzing . From us. Man looks on the screen, gives a fist on the table , got up and comes back . From the other shattering cheers , hugs, " Come on, guys, that I do" and the classic " them , them , their mother ." Again silence.
Five more minutes another call . All of us. Checks and she is wife , wasting another. Left jubilant . Silence .
Not a minute passes and third phone begins to ring us . All a wife . Most miserable day like it could not . Others already celebrating victory .
Call and one of them , but when he calls us to enjoy one of us. Both are eliminatory , tulle cape wives to each other. Mike left us four of them. Although the rules clearly not allowed manifestations supporters than a minute after elimination camp as the other held her lungs sing their song of victory " never walk alone" . What asses !
Mike looked at the phone as if apart from all the hubbub around and did not understand what was happening. Another call from them three to one , and I began to hope , but did not dare. Another one , ring and leaves the table , Mike remains two to one .
Thirsty throats we had dried , splash our eyes looking at the empty mugs bar, you could cut the tension with a knife . “Left-handers” began to tremble , we hope.
Be heard at once Shakira , Shakira Mike hates hair that resembles the mother-in law, is the other. One on one , so return not never took place throughout the history of sport . A drop in beer dispenser trickles back counter. We hear it all, and the left and right and swallow the load .
A further drop dripped on Mike 's temple . It's not beer . And then, with hundreds of staring at him , after a childhood that was always picked last and first fired at absolutely any game after years of marriage demolition of mind, Mike saw the light , he could win. His eyes rose slowly to the opponent and I swear it had steel look. Just then the phone rang .
We just collapsed when the bartender announces empty seats in offside sounds idiot his cousin, not his wife. If it happens like that all our cord snapped us how tense I was.
Sounds . Sounds and is not Mike s . Sounds . Other 's wife . Mike ! MIKE ! ! MIKE WINNNNNN ! ! !
The last male standing . I wore two shifts arms pub, chanting his name. By four o'clock , when the program has finished moving, “right-handed” would drink beer money as they can lead others. Mike was the hero of the day , win the battle alone because his wife , against all appearances, the logic and all I knew about them , do not call .
Mike was living the happiest day of his life when I left there was tears, or joy or because the beer started out his nose. Landed winners and he goes home to his wife thread .
" Hey, how come you called ? "
"I told my sister not to call you. "
" Well what ? "
"I do not know why. "
" What do you mean you do not know why I tell you to do something you always have to know why . "
" Yes , but she's my sister . "
Even so he could not come down replica of clouds Mike happiness that floated . As he shook his wings with the moon , I pull my wife aside.
" Babe, why you said does not call? "
" Honey, you remember two months ago when my phone broke me and you come home drunk like a wood? "
"Honestly I'm a little unclear how I got then ... "
" You were glad great need and you told me how you lead you team to victory. "
" Um ... and I tell it briefly and I told you more ? "
" With great detail , darling ..."
I look at my face female angel who fixed two months they never call me and say Sunday movement moved to tears :
" Babe, greater proof of love and respect that it could not give me . Baby , I love you so ... "
To which she stops me short :
" Like how to drink beer bullies those of our money ? "
foto credit: google.com
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HAVE A NICE DAY !
